Hypothetical

Thats all it seems I am good for. I get praised for a lot. Girls tell me how, perfect I am, what it be like to be with me, how I am better then everyone else they have ever considered.

I cant count how many how said "You can just live in bed" and half of those who have said promised money to ensure I was able to stay. You know, pay my bills at least.

But it never comes to fruition. I am a pipe dream. I am a ghost of a handsome gentleman. Being haunted by me is attractive at first. But the idea of spirit lying next to you is frightening after a while.

So they leave. The get to escape with the thoughts of what would of been. Awake from a beautiful dream, feeling better for it in the morning. But I am what happens to that beautiful dream after you leave. Since it was your dream, it revolved around you. Being gone it crumbles and I am left wondering around the desolate remains.

I have been loved by many. But a shallow love, in the sense of a tide pool. They only get their feet wet. If people take a piece of you when they love you, and that piece is measured by the depth of that love, then i am being picked apart. Now its not fatal. Love is re-genitive and infinite. But I am getting close to the bone for now.

Look at me, someone who has gone into so many Nihilistic rants, now expressing the infiniteness of love. The jading of women who tell those lies that no one can be blamed for. The hypothetical promises that raise such hope. I guess I am a hypocrite for giving Nietzsche (that near nihilist that made me realize Im not a nihilist, cause i am such a nihilist) giving him shit for being a sexist and that being his weakness in writing.

Rant Rant. Also this song came on random when i was writing this. It felt kind of fitting. And ive always loved it.